| Thursday, September 11, 2003
| THE WINDOWS OF MY WORLD
|7:35am 11 sept - i was awaken by a big bang at the back door - then i realized it was my youngest son Angelo, who has to go to school - then i remember - his car is at the shop being repaired. so i run at the back door and was not able to catch him. i called him on his cel fon n told him i ahve a hospital appointment at 9:30am. then he turned back and retunred the car at the garage. he asked me then to take him to his cousin's house so he cud use her wrngler jeep to school. its was a 3mins drive - my son is not talking to me inside the car on the way to his cousins house. he left the car and did not say anything to me.
IS IT MY WINDOW THAT IS TOO GLARY OR THE ROOF OF THE NEIGHBOR WHOSE HOUSE IS LOWER THAN MY HOUSE.?
at 8:30am , i prepared myself to go to the hospital- i am to have ultrasound of kidney/uthera/bladder (KUB) then after that i have to have my phostate cheked. a very hard procedure to undergo. i have to drive at least 45mins to the hospital. i havent' slept at all last two days. one of the medication prescribed to me gives me insomia. but i have no choice so the doctor said - just to take it in the morning - instead of evening.
WHY ARE THERE NO SQUIRREL COMING TO THE FRONT WINDOW AT THE RECEPTION AREA OF THE HOUSE?
AT 9:30AM-- all systems go. i was at the swedish covenant hospital inside one of the radiology dressing room. i have to prepare myself for the procedure. yes - i am scared - not of the procedure....but what the results would be. i cannot handle anymore the pain in my body. there is the nurse and the doctor in attendance. there was aprobe that has to be inserted at my rear end -- i have to take a deep breath said the doctor-- it will only take at least 5 to 10mins. that long???then the ultrasound begun.
WHY IS MY DOG MISTY NO LONGER GROWLING AT THE WINDOW BY THE KITCHEN?
at1135am - all is finished. now is the time of waiting for the results. two more days they said before we cud give your own doctor the results of the test. i was asked to sign the confidentiality paper. i have to write my name legibly first then affix my signature. then i was asked to wait at the waiting area to see if they cud get me today for colon check.
"sorry Mr. delos santos" said the nurse receptionist. "ur specialist said he will see you monday". so i hae to change and get out of the hospital gown.
WHY IS THERE NO SOUND OF ANYTHING OUTSIDE THE HOUSE - NO SOUND OF CAR NOT EVEN THENEIGHBOR CUTTING THEIR GRASS AND TRIMMING THE HEDGES?
i was at the parking lot of the hospital at 11:50 am - immediately called my wife from my cel fon at her work place and told her what had happened. i cried on the fon-- cuz i am scared. i don't want any other scary diagnosis. my wife told me "don't think about it hone- all will be well..just stay focused, next thing you knew - there's no problem at all". i sat down inside my car for 10mins, thinking deep of what is happening to me and my health.
WHY IS IT THAT WHEN YOU REACHED THE MID YEAR OF YOU LIFE, THERE'S ALWAYS PROBLEMS OF YOUR HEALTH.
i came home at 1215pm and parked the car at the back. i have opened up the back door and my dog misty is not there to greet me. so i called her name ten times before she appeared. so i asked her "where have you been little girl" then she just stared at me - and i noticed that her tail is not wiggling at me - that she normally does when i come home .so i asked my dog" are you also upset with your daddy"?
WHY IS THAT MAILMAN NOT YET HERE - I AM EXPECTING A MAIL AND HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HERE NOW AT THIS TIME.
i sat down at the kitchen table and have to take my first three pills of the day - one for my thyroid -- two for my gout ----one for my high blood pressure. when will this ritual ends? all of my medications are for life. i still have to three more tonite before bed time so that it will not mess up my kidnes and liver. it has to be taken at bedtime so all other organs are at rest also.
WHY DID THAT GARBAGE COLLECTOR DID NOT PICK THE RECYCLE TUB? I WILL CAL AND COMPLAINT.
i have not been working since monday 08spet. i was not feeling well. having a hard time urinating. called work and advised personnel what is happening and they told me to get the necessary documentations from my doctor.and i said " i know the rules". last aug 28, while i was at work, i had tremors and palpitations. muy boss saw me stopping down in my counter by the computer and got alarmed. asked me what is happenign and saw my tremor. she got scared and called the paramedics. i told my boss it will pass - my thyroid is at large again. but she was very scared - then the paramedicas came and checked me out. then they asked if i want to go to the hospital - so i told them i will jsut rest. and then my boss told me to just go home and rest at home.
WHY IS THAT SCHOOL BUS PARKED INFRONT OF MY HOUSE? I DON'T LIKE THE SMOKE COMING FROM THE EXHAUST OF THAT BUS.. I WIL CALL THE SCHOOL DISTRICT
i was always a sickly person, even when i was growing up. i am always sick when i was in the seminary and they always take care of me there. during this time of my waiting period at home for the scheduled test - i havge searched and looked for some avenue to direct my attention and focused them towards a diferent thing to avoid getting overcome by my ilnesses. i took the blog met thru the net a man called jay who has a jet and they have friends --- i have offended them and over indulged myself into some jokes that is not good and beffitting. so i sent a note to this jay of jet and to jet of jay that i am sorry. i dont have to make excusses..---- i just don't know the PROTOCOLS/THE ETHOS/THE ETHICS/THE MORES of the blogspot. i am sorry to those that i have offended. this will be my last entry - lest i offend some more people.
WHY DID MY APPLE TREE DID NOT BEAR FRUITS THIS YEAR AND THE LEAVES HAS CHANGE SO DRASTICALLY AND HAVE FALLEN TO THE GROUND?
....... i hate you MR.FALL - why do you come early. let me have the chance to see
....... all the nice greens of my surroundings and let me have the chance to
....... savor the beauty and the color of my hardy mums at the front lawn
....... i want my veggies at the backyard to stay longer..
oh MR. Fall dont be so cruel with me. i am on the dawning of my life and you are starting to take away the color immediately from it.
------ come early MISS SPRING, bring forth early my daffodils and tulips...
------ let the lilyof the valleys come early too...
------ prolong the life of my roses and let the magnolias linger longer this year...
------ oh MISS SPRING.... stay with me and make me happy.
VENI VIDI VICI.... i came, i saw, i conquered- - - and i lost.
|posted by infraternam meam @ 1:13 PM