| Saturday, September 13, 2003
|"NIHIL OBSTAT PART III"
(no objection/no say/charing kah/shut up n go/bahala ka sa buhay mo)
.... excerpts from LIFE'S IMPONDERABLES by Felfman,David....
1.WHY DO DOGS WALK AROUND IN CIRCLES BEFORE LYING DOWN?
"accdng to some experts, they believe that circling is a way for a dog to map their territory.Elizabeht Crosby Metz, explains"i believe it is also has to do witH spreading their proprietary scent around the nesting site saying: keep away, this is my nest!"
SAY KO....the aso is just making sure there is no other dog's tae in the area before she/he sleeps der....say mo
NIHIL OBSTAT ka..
2. WHY DO HUMANS LOST MOST OF THEIR BODY HAIR?
"accdng to Desmond Morris, hair loss might have had a sexual and reporductive basis.male mammals generally are haireir than their female counterparts.this type of sex based physiological difference helps make one sex more attractive"
SAY KO....if all the hair in your body is gone..kasi nasa ilong mo nang lahat....pweeeeh..NIHIL OBSTAT kah...
3. WHY DO CURAD BANDAGE WRAPPERS SPARKLE IN THE DARK WHEN YOU OPEN THEM?
"accdng to the research and development of colgate palmolive, said that static electricity might add to the sparkling effect. the sparkling is perfectly harmless and, if you are cut, a nice diversion from your pain"
SAY KO...curad bandage wrappers sparkle in the dark when open , kasi this helps all ago go dancers at the karaoke bars to dress up easily before they dance....NIHIL OBSTAT ka rin..
4. WHY DO BANANAS, UNLIKE OTHER FRUITS, GROW UPWARD?
"accdng to Jack D. deMent, of the Dole Fresh Fruit company, a flower is found on the tip of each individual fruit. this flower is removed during packing but is present during the fruit development.as the hands turn up, the flower is better exposed to insects and nectar eating birds and bats."
SAY KO...kasi real reason bananas grow upward..they are given VIAGRA para tumayo...pweeeh..sobra kang NIHIL OBSTAT..
5. WHY DO SNAKES DART OUT THEIR TONGUES?
"accdng to Imponderables, the tongue of the snake is actually an invaluable sensory organ for the snake. it enables the reptile to troll for food, while its way over the ground".
SAY KO...kasi ang ahas cannot take VIAGRA, so dila na lang ang gamit...heh..pweeeeh..NIHIL OBSTAT ka nga diyan..
6. WHY DO OLD WOMEN DYE THEIR HAIR BLUE?
"accdng to cosmetician Richard Levac, the hair becomes more porous as we grow old, smoke coats the hair and embeds itself in the hair shaft causing yellowing.blue rinses are much lighter than they were twenty years ago. if you can notice the blue from hair of a customer coming out of the salon, it means to say hairdresser has done a poor job"
SAY KO....'yong gurang kasi, nagpapabata pa..gustong maging Material Girl din siya pag chica..pero pag chico sya..he has ambition to be part of Greatful Dead...etoh talaga..para kang hindi gurang...NIHIL OBSTAT kah....
7. WHY ARE COWS USUALLY MILKED FROM THE RIGHT SIDE?
"accdng to Dr. Harold Amstutz of the American Asso of Bovine Practitioners..since most people are right handed, it is logical to sit down on the right side of the cow and have more room to maneuver the milk bucket".
SAY KO... tanga..reason right side..kasi kung iba pa ang makapa mo..eh di cow tadyak your face...tangngeh..NIHIL OBSTAT ka rin.
8. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN AN X-RATED MOVIE AND AN XXX -RATED MOVIE?
"accdng to David F.Friedman, board chairman of the Adult Film Asso of America, whether or not any of the film versions of a pornographic movie is billed X or XXX is more dependent on the whims of the producer or the theater management than on the content of the movie".
SAY KO....one X..you will only see it once..hindi hot masyado... XXX duling ka na..sige pa sila...Blessed are the crosseyed..for they shall see Twice...talaga eto oh...
shut up!! NIHIL OBSTAT, ka nga diyan...
9. WHY DO OLD MEN WEAR THEIR PANTS HIGHER THAN YOUNG MEN?
"accdng to FRED sHIPPE, of the American Apparel Manufacturers asso., most men above the age of fifty, let alone much older men, never had the experience of wearing pants designed to hang on the hips than on the waist, they feel uncomfortable."
SAY KO....kasi if you are gurang ...hindi mo na alam kung where is your bewang and where is your leeg moh..... moh....understang!!!....NIHIL OBSTAT kah nga diyan...sepa kita...
10. WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF PUBIC AND UNDERARM HAIR, THE ONLY BODY HAIR THAT MEN AND WOMEN SHARE IN ABUNDANCE?
"accdng to Barbara and Celeste Hogan, the most popular explanation is that pubic hair and armpit hair both trap the milky fluid secreted by the subaceous glands."
SAY KO...kasi if you have lotsa lotsa hair down der..n if you are a girl trying to sell..if u dont want the guy down der..you can always tell the guy"pwede sa kili kili na lang"?....may pagka ulol ka talaga...NIHIL OBNSTAT ka nga diyan...
11.WHY DO SOME CHICKENS LAY BROWN EGGS AND OTHERS LAY WHITE EGGS?
"accdng to Jo Ellen Flynn of canyon country, calif..yolk color is influenced primarily by the pigments in the chicken feed.if the hen gets plenty of yellow orange plant pigments known as xanthophylls, the pigments will be deposited in the yolk.hens with mash and yellow corn and alfalfa meal will lay eggs with medium yellow color, those fed with wheat or barley, will yield ligther yolks".
SAY KO...if other manok has brown eggs, kasi the hen has UTI(unrinary tract infection)...pweeeh ka rin...,NIHIL OBSTAT..
HAPPY TRAILS TO EVERYBODY .....'to mel
|posted by infraternam meam @ 2:25 PM