IN FRATERNAM MEAM: THE PAIN OF BURYING A YOUNGER BROTHER...

IN FRATERNAM MEAM

Sunday, September 11, 2005

THE PAIN OF BURYING A YOUNGER BROTHER...

MANILA/ Philippines:
My kid brother died and faced his creator at 48 years of age. Survived by his wife and two kids... a boy of 19 years old and a girl of 15 years of a age.

It was a long battle with Cancer. One year and four months of agony and pain, both for himself and his family and all his love ones.

He died at the Asian Hospital and Medical Center Alabang/ Muntinlupa City/ Philippines. He was merely under 80 lbs in weight when he was rushed again on an off and on again hospital treatment by some of the best and renown cancer doctor in the Philippines, but to no avail.

CAUSE OF DEATH: Cardiorespiratory Arrest secondary to Multi-Organ System Failures antecedent cause of Pulmonary Metastasis and Underlying cause from Esophageal Cancer.

He had fought a long battle and died at 8:23 PM at his room at the Asian Hospital and Medical Center, 31 August 2005.

Strange at it seems in the Philippines -- a patient with money can get the most state of the art medical equipments and all money can buy for doctors and all medical staff. The room of my brother is so well appointed, round the clock nurse watch and medical staff presence all of the time. My parents and the rest of the family was there on his last breath. I was not there and my brother and other sister because all of three us are permanently residing abroad and decided to change our nationality. But some of my sisters decided to stay in the Philippines and to look after the interst of the family's business and that of my aging parents, who does not want to live in the States under my father's privilege as a U.S. Army veteran.

According to my eldest sister, the doctor at the Asia Hospital is still saying that my brother has to be given an authopsy because this is the SOP of the hospital. My eldest sister declined and advised the doctor if they proceed to such thing without our permission, we will take them to court. My brother already suffered and does not not need to be subjected to another scrutiny by doctors whose primary insterest is not the study of the body, cause he is already dead, but additional payment for the authopsy that will be done with my kid brother. My eldest sister put her best foot forward and told the hospital that if she has to involved our lawyers on such things that the hospital wants to be done with my brother -- we will be the first ones to take the this hospital to court since this is a brand new hospital.

I was asking myself, since all payments are done in managers check or caseh--- what about some of our Kababayans who does not have the money to pay for the services? They will just suffer and just die and will not be given any decent medical attention. We were told that this hospital and the rest of the hoisptals in the Philippines, upon admission of patient(s) demands a big and substantial deposit to the hospital.

The wake of my brother was held at Funeraria Paz inside the grounds of Manila Memorial Park, where we have our cemetery plots.

It is so hard to bury a brother--- my father was grasping for breathe during the Requiem Mass and we thought he will have a heart attack. My father had a quadruple by-pass and was having a hard time breathing. The doctor and the nurses of my parents were there to look after them. All of our hearts was in agony looking at the family of my brother and that of our aging parents who are 84 and 82 years old respectively.

It is so hard to bury a brother--- because we cannot accept the fate that he has undergone and the pain and sufferings with it. On his last hours, the doctors said the cancer has already attacked and destroyed the spine and the entire internal organs. Pain-- unbeliveable pain and suffering.

It is so hard to bury a brother--- when you cannot expect this young man, who has so much energy and so much things to give and lots of ambitions and plans for his family. We have told him, while he was still alive that no matter what happens, his family will be taken cared of.

It is so hard to bury a brother-- because we bury also with it a part of ourselves. We have pour ourselves and our hearts on all the sufferings and pains of my brother,and it is so hard to see our parents having a hard time coping with the pain and the lost of their youngest son.

Sleep easy my brother, you're HOME NOW!

We have now said goodbye to our brother,
we all love him, BUT GOD LOVES HIM MORE.

posted by infraternam meam @ 12:11 AM

4 Comments:

At 4:27 AM, Kiwipinay said…

kalokohan naman yata yung SOP nila na ipa-autopsy pa? ano pa io-autopsy nila eh obvious naman na ang tagal sa kanila ng pasyente at ang naging sakit ng pasyente? if i know, kakatayin lang nila ang mga laman-loob ng mga namatay. style nila, bulok no?

nakabalik na pala kayo, manong mel. nakikiramay po ako ulit sa inyo.
At 6:27 AM, cathy said…

Prayers for your brother, Frat.
He is now in peace.
At 3:38 AM, infraternam meam said…

beth...tks for the comments. it was really so hard to bury a brother. and yes, i found out in pinas, if you hae the money, the hospital will take advantage of you. i will be returning bak to manila again end of sept. we have to do the 40days novena.
At 3:39 AM, infraternam meam said…

cath....tks a million. i need to blog and remove the pain. my brother did a long battle with cancer. his spine and bones and the entire internal organ succumb to cancer.